www.pixsy.com

 

Making art is a mystical process..A lot of people who are artists don't understand it themselves. Especially the young ones. They feel different, but they don't know what it is...They feel more.. Everything hurts. Everything. They're super sensitive. They see things that other people don't see. It can be crippling...

  

Why you shouldn't date a photographer

 

1. They’re weird

 

Photographers are artists. And that should be self explanatory. You might find yourself at a restaurant table with a photographer who is looking deep into your eyes. Well, don’t be fooled. He’s probably thinking about your best angle

 

2. The birthday presents will surprise you

 

Most of the times it will be a framed portrait of yourself, captured some time ago when you probably weren't looking.

 

3. Their favorite days are not yours

 

Like most people, you probably enjoy a bright, sunny day. Well, photographers enjoy foggy, gloomy mornings that would make most people sad.

 

4. They’re hoarders

 

Photographers collect piles of news papers, magazine, and generally anything they find inspiring, even for a short term.

 

5. They will break the law

  

Trespassing into abandoned buildings has always been a favorite activity among photographers, and they rarely even concern themselves with the fact that they are breaking laws.

 

6. Your vacation luggage will look like you’re moving

 

That’s because no photographer who respects himself will go on vacations without at least 50lbs of gear.

 

7. Watching movies together will not be as expected

   

The reason for that is because photographers will constantly criticize choice of color and frame composition in a movie.

 

8. They mark everything

 

Especially their photos. You will rarely see a photographer’s portfolio that’s not full of watermarks.

 

9. Everyone else sucks

 

Photographers are very proud creatures. Therefore, nobody else’s work is as good as theirs, and, at best, it can only come close.

 

10. Envy takes a new form

 

Among men, there is the well-known term penis envy. Among photographers, it’s a whole different thing. It’s called camera envy.

 

11. They spend time with cool people

 

You might be an interesting person with interesting friends, but photographers spend most of their time with models, stylists, designers and other cool people.

 

12. Their movie choices are different than yours

 

That’s because most of their choices are old, artsy movies that most people never get.

 

13. They like to play it vintage…in excess

 

They either use film cameras or dress like photographers did forty years ago.

 

14. They are control freaks

 

They like to control the position of anything. Whether it’s you or the coffee cup on the table. It has to look good.

 

15. They don’t care about your opinions

 

Yet they always want to show you their latest photos.

 

16. Their communications is awkward at the least

 

They might not return your phone calls or Facebook messages, but you can be sure that if you check their Instagram account, it will be active on a daily basis.

 

17. They are way too honest about your looks

 

If you ask a photographer if you look fat, he’ll probably say yes, but not to worry, he’ll Photoshop it later.

 

18. They spend most of their time in front of a computer

 

It’s not for Facebook or porn, but they can spend days in a row editing their pictures.

 

19. Romantic sunsets will never be the same

 

Unlike any other people, when you gaze at a beautiful sunset with a photographer, instead of feeling the romantic mood, they’ll probably be thinking “f8 at 1/125”.

 

20. They won’t spend any serious money on you

 

If you go out with a photographer and point out a certain pair of shoes that you really like, you should remove any expectations. They might cost 100$ but they won’t get them for you. Instead, they will spend a $1000 on glass for themselves.

 

21. Meals together will be quite different

 

Instead of actually enjoying their meal, photographers will probably spend the first five minutes to Instagram the dish from every possible angle.

 

22. They hate it when your friends ask photography questions

 

One thing photographers hate being asked by newbies, are questions about camera purchases. They get irritated when someone wants a camera “that takes good pictures, but it shouldn’t be anything professional”.

 

23. Holding hands will be pretty rare

 

That’s because they’ll be carrying a heavy camera most of the times.

 

24. They never send you the photos they take…of you

 

Noticed how your photographer girlfriend or boyfriend snapped a few random shots of you the other day? Don’t worry. You’ll probably never see them.

 

25. They don’t run away from natural disasters

 

If you live in a hurricane active area and are dating a photographer…good luck! Instead of running away, your love one will probably wait around for the action to happen, just to get some dramatic shots in that rare light.

 

26. Anniversaries will be missed

 

Think of it this way: if your anniversary and an interesting workshop happen on the same day, you might as well forget about the romantic dinner.

 

27. They are hazardous to themselves

 

If any accidents happen or if there is a hazardous situation, a photographer will protect his gear before anything else. That means that you or they are secondary priorities.

 

28. They stare at people in public

 

If you catch your date staring at someone attractive or, just as well someone different, don’t worry, they’re not having any dirty thoughts. They’re probably just imagining the photo they would take of that person. It doesn’t make it any less awkward or embarrassing though.

 

29. They find beauty in the weirdest places

 

That includes dirty alleys, places with a lot of poverty or just about any other location normal people would stay away from.

 

30. You’ll have a hard time proving that you were together on vacation

 

That’s because they’ll be taking most of the pictures, without themselves being in front of the camera.

 

31. They won’t photograph what you ask them

 

Think having a photographer partner will bring you advantages? Think again. Photographers are very proud and stubborn creatures and they will rarely photograph anything they consider unworthy, unless it’s paid or they like it.

 

32. They’ll remind everyone of what it is they do

 

If you’re out socializing with friends and are having a normal conversation, don’t expect it to last too long. Your date will probably be jumping in with some “killer” stories about a place or a person they photographed in the past.

 

33. Birthday presents will be expensive

 

Anything under $500 will probably not buy them anything useful for their hobby, not something they already haven’t got anyway.

 

34. They won’t Photoshop your older photos

 

Your older vacation or family photos might need some improvement and your photographer partner should be just the person for the job. Not likely. Their ego will prevent them from editing anything not taken by them.

 

35. They don’t like your emo and artsy friends

 

That’s because unless it’s someone more famous than them, they’re not really worth spending time with.

 

36. They hardly print any of their work

 

Yet the storage space on their computer is always low because of the massive numbers of photographs.

 

37. If you accidentally drop a camera, you’ll owe them big time

 

The average contents of a photographer’s bag cost anywhere between $1500 and …well a lot. Make sure you are extra careful around their gear, or else.

 

38. You’ll turn into a model, whether you like it or not.

 

It might seem like fun in the beginning, but don’t be fooled. Whenever you’re out for a walk and the light will seem interesting for your date, you’ll have to pose for at least one portrait. And no, the clothes you’ll be wearing won’t matter.

 

39. They’re a pain at family events

 

Let’s say someone in your family is getting married and you decide to bring your date. Most of their attention will probably be going to the photographer hired to shoot the wedding. It will be a mix of criticism of everything the hired pro does and a secret envy that he didn’t get to do it, even after refusing in the first place.

 

40. Nothing natural is good

 

Translated: every picture must be tweaked with Photoshop or Lightroom. Don’t ever expect to see any pictures straight out of the camera.

 

41. When staring into your eyes, it usually means something else

 

You might find it to be a romantic moment, but it’s usually a process that goes on in their mind and has to do with how they would correct the tiny imperfections on your face.

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  • JoinedSeptember 2010
  • OccupationPhotographer
  • HometownSan Antonio
  • Current cityWimberley, Texas
  • CountryUS
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Photos of Jim Allen

Testimonials

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Your gallery is great. Since I joined flickr in December 2020, you are the contact I visit most often. Your pictures, works are unique and inspiration for me at the same time. I will certainly visit here more often and marvel. Many greetings from Germany (Bavaria).

February 13, 2021

Le agradezco mucho, la inclusión de mi foto "Industria uruguaya", en el grupo Sé donde estás". Un cordial saludo, desde Uruguay.

July 26, 2019

I love your photo's, your specific style !! Beautiful, very impressive photostream !!

July 12, 2020

No words needed here - fantastic photos that tell us everything!

September 17, 2020

Beautiful gallery, great work!!

July 20, 2018

Jim , have a beautiful photostream , extremely great , interesting and amazing .. he is bright and talented in the world of photography , and has an eye for a great object and finding a great photo , so i would not be surprise to see his image in any photography , gallery a great a… Read more

Jim , have a beautiful photostream , extremely great , interesting and amazing .. he is bright and talented in the world of photography , and has an eye for a great object and finding a great photo , so i would not be surprise to see his image in any photography , gallery a great and have an eye for an artist.. ...He had many followers and friends and i am impressed of that .. i appreciate his kindness for being someone especial , as a person and a great photographer .. he is a person that i like and which i can call my friend ...This is my testimony by all that i saw ... take care and keep on clicking dear JIM ....

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November 20, 2016
Mrs.WQ says:

Oh my gosh Jim you are way too funny and you just described my middle son (22yrs old) to a tee!! I love your birthday gifts...I love your photography and well I don't have -----envy but well you get the picture!

October 12, 2014

I just read that very lengthy profile description and found it quite hilarious. Not all of them apply to me but seeing as how I've been a photographer for 19 years, many of them do. I enjoyed the laugh either way!

June 25, 2014

I just love your story about why not to date a photographer !

June 17, 2014
Dinky4u says:

JLallen1111 is one of my most favorite contacts,he is always there to comment on others photos, but yet i don't know his real name lol just kidding! i enjoy the wonderful comments he make on my stream, and his pictures are truly amazing, you are very talented. you have become one of my most favorite contact i real… Read more

JLallen1111 is one of my most favorite contacts,he is always there to comment on others photos, but yet i don't know his real name lol just kidding! i enjoy the wonderful comments he make on my stream, and his pictures are truly amazing, you are very talented. you have become one of my most favorite contact i really enjoy all you shots you keep your stream interesting and i never know what is coming up next,lol it is a real pleasure having you as a contact.God Bless and Happy Shooting for many more years to come. Tammy

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October 20, 2011

Your enthusiasm is infectious. Your photos are beautiful. Your attention to your comments is admirable. Cheers, sedge808.

August 25, 2011

Thank you for sharing your beautiful pictures ............. and thank you for being such a great contact :)

May 30, 2011